There’s an age-old cynicism about having a bad boss that has resulted in countless memes, jokes, TV show plots, and more. But the truth of the matter is, whether you have a great or horrible boss, it is in your best interest to impress them and do your best to make them appreciate you and your work. You should be actively thinking of ways to make your boss see your value, actually even more so if you think they are a “bad” boss. I’ve had amazing bosses and truly awful ones in the course of my career, and frankly, I wasn’t able to keep to this goal all the time. But now, with a lot of working life under my belt, I think those of you who are struggling with bad bosses can learn from some of the lessons I’ve learned and strategies I’ve developed.
Don’t take things personally
If you really do have a bad boss, you and everyone else around you probably knows it. Sometimes it may feel like you are being singled out or taking the brunt of the criticism, but try not to take it personally. This isn’t about you, it’s about them. It can be frustrating when you are working hard and doing your best, but your boss doesn’t recognize it, it may even feel like your co-workers and other leaders won’t notice either because of all the criticism you are taking. But more than likely they do appreciate your good work, it is just hard for them to stick their neck out on your behalf.
If you are able to let the criticisms and way your bad boss treats you go it won’t take such an emotional toll on you. In fact, you may be able to see it as a positive, if your boss didn’t see you as capable, or even as a threat, they likely wouldn’t pay so much attention to you at all. Or on the other hand, if they treat everyone the same way, then it really isn’t personal and you can let it go. At one of my jobs, I got yelled at by my boss on my second day, she was explaining how a system worked to me and I asked a follow-up question using standard industry terminology. She instantly started berating me and acting like I was stupid because that wasn’t the phrasing they used at this company. I felt horrible for a long time afterward, especially because this happened in the middle of a sea of cubicles and I thought everyone else agreed with her and thought I wasn’t an idiot. It wasn’t until later when I became closer to some other colleagues that they told me how ridiculous she was being and I shouldn’t feel bad.
Rise above the noise
With a bad boss, or in any toxic workplace, it is easy to get bogged down in petty drama that doesn’t matter. Especially if you are junior, you can get pulled in many different directions and now know where you should be putting in your efforts. I’ve found that it is best to pick one or two areas you know you can make measurable and visible impact in and focus your efforts there. Do the minimum to do what is required in other areas, but make a bet on these keystone projects and be sure to see them through to a successful conclusion.
If you have chosen the right projects, other teams and leaders will see your success, and even if your boss resents it, you will have accomplishments under your belt and have gained good experience. If you can combine this with the last strategy of making your boss look good, then it will be a win-win for everyone and may even start to turn the tide of your relationship with them.
Become indispensable
This is good advice even if you have a great boss, but if you have a bad boss it becomes even more important. And this doesn’t just mean kissing ass and becoming a lackey for your boss. But become a trusted indispensable partner for the teams you collaborate with as well. Honestly, there are enough bad workers in the world, it doesn’t take much to be someone people love to work with. Be polite, respond on time, be proactive, don’t shove responsibilities off on others, bring ideas and your expertise to the able, and you’ll already be far ahead of most people.
If you become seen as someone who is reliable and indispensable to getting things done in your function, even your bad boss won’t be able to get in the way of you being recognized by the overall team. Of course, it also helps to build the relationship with your boss as well, with both bad and good bosses I have done things like going the extra mile to help them with urgent projects, stepping up to do things that don’t fall under my scope and made sure to deliver what they need. You don’t want to be walked all over by a bad boss, but sometimes by doing a little more at the right time, you earn their trust and ease the relationship bit by bit.
Adapt to them
This is also actually true for both bad and good bosses, but much more vital for the poor ones. Jocko Willink has said “Sometimes you just have to play the game.” and I completely agree. If your boss has some request that isn’t logical or there is a better way, you have to judge which battles to fight, and a lot of the time it isn’t worth it to be right, it is easier and helps your relationship more just to do it the way they ask.
I think this is also really important in a more general sense of your boss’ working style and priorities. In my last two roles, I went from a boss who was very big picture-oriented, they didn’t care how I got things done as long as they were done correctly. And the projects they were attracted to were big and ambitious, things that would be highly visible and make a splash. My next boss was extremely detail-oriented and wanted to know everything down to the tiniest element. They were also super conservative and wouldn’t give the go-ahead for any initiative that didn’t have an almost 100% chance of success. Going from these two extremes took me a lot of time to adjust to, but when I was finally able to adapt to the new boss our working relationship got a lot better and we were both happier.
Make your boss look good
This can be painful, especially if you and your boss really don’t like each other, but it might be the most important strategy. This can be little things, like when you are talking to people about your projects, use “we” instead of “I”, even if your boss or coworkers didn’t do anything on it. I also have made it a point in several of my roles to find awards and recognitions I would put my boss up for, I tried to make them look good by giving them PR opportunities in media, having them highlighted internally, etc. This also may be harder if you have a bad boss, but it feeds their ego, which is the source of a lot of problems for toxic managers. In the end, if your boss looks good, you end up looking good too. And even if they don’t admit it out loud, they will see you are making efforts to up their status and will appreciate it.
With all this being said, sometimes when the boss is bad enough, you just have to cut ties and get out of there. But I believe with these strategies a lot of “bad boss” relationships can be improved enough to at least make them tolerable to the point you can keep progressing in your career and experience even if you are stuck in that role for a while. If you liked this article, click here to read about The Worst Career Advice I’ve Ever Heard.